To commemorate this year’s Mother’s Day—an occasion to honour mothers—Nagaland Post reached out to some of the incredible supermoms, who, besides dealing with daily challenges, contribute to family and society in their own unique way. As the American author, Mitch Albom said, ‘behind all your story is always your mother’s story because hers is where your begins’, while these may be the least of the many incredible women, their stories reflect the resilience, strength, and love that characterize mothers everywhere.
Dr Mhasiseno T Belho, proprietor of Dr. Belho’s Clinic, Dimapur is an experienced OBGYN in her 24th year of service, states motherhood has been “a full-throttle career mom raising three conscientious free spirit Gen alpha girls.” She revealed her dictum of ‘Better me first, and then better them! My desire is to raise emotionally and socially balanced daughters in a world that is hard-wired for a child to excel in academics’.
As a doctor, Dr. Belho finds value in what may seem “like mundane activities to others, particularly on Sundays”, as that is the only quality time she can devote when compared to the weekdays. In her message to women, as an expertise of the field, her concern would be on access to cervical cancer vaccination for women aged 9-45 years, timely Pap smear tests for married women, and the necessity of proper antenatal care with institutional delivery, drawing from her expertise in obstetrics and gynecology.
Dr. Hewasa L Khing, Principal of Tetso College, whose affluent educational proves, where she is today is a mother of 2. She states, “I cannot fathom the kind of challenges faced by mothers in the past when they did not have means to the advancements we currently have.” As a full time academician, Khing added, “the joy of getting my son to school on time is an accomplishment of the day”. On the aspects of family dynamics, she commended all women, who, despite limited resources, demonstrate resilience, stating, “they can accomplish almost anything they set their mind to”. Commenting on the diversity of parenting styles and against judgment, asserted, “Every mother has her own style of coparenting and managing the family which works, so I don’t think we should be hard or judgmental on each other even if we do things differently.”
Apane Lasuh, wife to the Senior Pastor of Chakhesang Baptist Church, Kohima, is the mother of two. She mentioned that one daunting task and challenging factor is that humans, though imperfect, see church leaders as revered. She said, ‘to practice what one preaches on stage’ is deemed to be the enriching way, while being in the limelight, something she highly abides by, even through her children. As the support system to her husband’s ministry, she said being a ‘humble mother’ can attain an absolute sense of a ‘well-performed task as a mother,’ because in the utmost sense of spirituality, ‘being a mother is the foundation, a responsibility to lead not only one’s children in the Love of God.’ She said, ‘any women who have been in my shoes can testify that despite times of poor health or even making additional plans away from the church is not easy as anyone may think.’
Dr Watinaro Longkumer Kiewhuo, Associate professor, and a mother of one, states, “I define motherhood in a very big spectrum. It doesn’t have to be someone who gave birth to a child, but I call myself as a mother.” She added her role beyond biological motherhood, helps build an emotional connection with them. She notes the increasing visibility of women as a sign of progress towards autonomy and empowerment, remarking, “Today if you look in the main road, you will see more women driving today, which are the strides women have made towards autonomy and empowerment.” She remarked that, embracing motherhood should not be a factor that discourages anyone from ‘chasing their dream.” She advises prioritizing personal well-being while caring for others, while also being a full time working woman themselves.
Apucho Theluo, a full-time homemaker and mother of five kids, expressed a common sentiment among parents, that as their infants grow, there’s a longing for them to remain small due to the rapid passage of time. Theluo recognized that motherhood brings blessings when approached with dedication and care. As her kids grow in stages, she adds, ‘I do worry if anything were to go wrong, but also I also pray for the protecting arms, that they will be able to grow into responsible adults’. In her advice to young mothers, she advised them to build confidence and boldness, despite initially feeling lost or out of place.
She also noted the importance of trusting in oneself and not succumbing to fear or doubt, as doing so may cause them to miss out on significant opportunities. When not at home, she devotes her time as a deacon to her parent church, CBCK Kohima.
Aying Wangsha, a Member of the Nagaland State Commission for Protection of Child Rights, is a mother of two based in Dimapur. Prior to her current work status, she was the Principal of Konjong Higher Secondary School in Mon for a little more than 5 years. She said that even after embracing motherhood, she takes it as an accomplishment of ‘being able to make one of the most important decisions in my life.’ As a full-time working mom to a child with special needs, she faces the challenge of balancing work and family life while being concerned about her child’s future. She admitted to sacrificing her ‘stable job’ to relocate to a new place for the sake of her child’s future. She says that a very hard decision today enables her child to go to an inclusive school.”
Speaking of the ‘silent grief’ that few have to bear witness to, she says it is a hurdle because for her it is as important to give a child ‘that is safe and more acceptable’ while drawing on the continued support she has witnessed so far. She says beyond her understanding, through an enthusiastic nature from within and her faith in God and His purpose for each one have kept her going so far. Quoting Jeffrey R. Holland, “The work of a mother is hard, too often unheralded work. Please know that it is worth it then, now, and forever,” she encouraged all not to misuse the special privilege given even when life is different by circumstances.
Henlly Phom Odyuo, Senior Journalist at Eastern Mirror, is a mother of 2 and has been in the media field for 11 years. She opens up about being a mother while following one’s passion, stating, ‘Despite being married, I get to follow my passion, especially after many assumed I would quit after marriage.’
Answering how, despite equally contributing to the family, women are often subjected to judgments, she said they are still judged, yet every woman should be confident in making the right choices and setting boundaries, stating, ‘At the end of the day, one should learn to say no and not feel burdened.’ Crediting her husband for instilling confidence that family responsibilities are not solely the mother’s job, she expresses much gratitude for the support of her in-laws. She admitted that many times, people mistake her profession as highly paid. While weighing the prestige and opportunity, she said, ‘it ought to be selfless dedication’ for those who wish to follow in her path.”
Pinky Longchar, a police personal and single mother of one daughter, has been in force for 10+ years, currently based with East Police Station of the 15th IR. Longchar admits to feeling pained by the inability to spend as much quality time with her daughter as she would like, while taking pride in her commitment to public service. When questioned if she has encountered any discomforts due to her marital status, she responded, ‘Being a single mother, I have taken it as a calling to embrace motherhood with confidence. Despite the absence of a father, my earnest intention is to provide the best of myself to both my child and my service to the public.’ While the grappling realities can never be fully spoken, she challenged all other mothers who may be in her shoes that with ‘unwavering faithful commitment, while fully rooted in God, one can be a better example for the child’.